A Memory...

As I was tweaking the blog I remembered something that I knew I wouldn't for next week's tweak. So, I decided to post it instead.

My father was a very charismatic man. Good looking, well mannered, and due to the military had a definant PRESENCE wherever he went - he commanded attention. I don't ever really remember seeing my dad in his dress uniform or fatigues - he retired from the military when I was two. However, something must have left an impression at an early age, as I LOVE to see men in uniform! I can't help feel proud of what they are doing and the way they look.

Anyhow, back to my subject =].... part of my dad's charisma - to me - was that he sang. He had a deep baritone and he sang around the house, while he was working at chores, with my brothers at family functions and he used to sing solo's in church. I so LOVED listening to my dad sing. My favorite solo's he sang was "I walked today where Jesus walked" and "Jerusalem". I still can hear my dad's voice singing when someone else sings either song - very bittersweet. I so wish we'd gotten a chance to tape my brothers and dad sing "Brightly Beams" - accapella and 4 part harmony. It was the sweetest thing and we heard it often at family celebrations.

There is this little thing called pride and self prejudice. Many, many people used to come up to my dad and comment on how wonderful his song was or thank you for singing. My father LOVED music - =] ever wondered where I got it from? That is, until the one Sunday when I think I was 11 or 12, he sang a solo in church and recorded it. He sang Jerusalem, I can still picture that Sunday in my mind. We went home after church like every other Sunday but dad put the tape in when we got home. He didn't even listen to the entire song.... he said how horrible he sounded, how people must be tone-deaf, and that he would never sing in public again. And he didn't. No more choir, no more solo's, no more singing while he worked unless (like me) he didn't think anyone could hear him or he'd whistle only.

Now, how many grandkids reading this, knew that Grandpa used to sing? I'm 5 yrs older than the oldest of you so only the 5 oldest would have ever heard him or you might remember when we could coax him to sing with your dad's at a family function. Pride and Self-Predjudice.... what are they keeping you from doing that you love?

Well.... DUH

lol.. knowing me you shouldn't be surprised that I make adjustments and alterations to my blog all the time. However; I noticed that on some lists... they are too LONG- psh I don't even want to read through them! LOL. So, I've decided that I will update and when I do, I will delete past things - so if you missed it - it's gone! Poof - =].

Most of you know me personally, well .... do you really? >] So, I started a column over on the side of personal stories. Starting with how Dean and I met...yep ... nope no mistakes, we really did meet and were in engaged 2 weeks after, married 3 months. But, I'm also going to include memories that I personally had with my mom, my dad, or my kids. That way, for the multiple nieces and nephews out there reading this, you can get to know me and them a little bit better.

Hope you enjoy!

Wahoo for Estrogen!

I have said for YEARS that my hormones are outta whack. But, no one believed me or they would just switch my birth control - psh. However, after seeing a prescribing nurse for my "psycotropic" drugs and a therapist who says I'm one of the most sane people she's ever met (HA, at the time I wanted her to admit me to the Phsyc ward) one finally said, well if its cyclic, than we can't do anthing about that you need to talk to your OB. The NP at my OB's put me on Premarin - Estrogen supplements. 0.0 they found my sanity! Oh my heck! WAHOO!

I have been taking them now for 3 wks so they are finally in my system and there is a WORLD of difference in my world. Like this morning- I walked a mile and got outta bed before 11! =0 (oh did I mention I don't sleep until like 3am?) I'm going to start walking another mile before bed to see if that helps me not only lose weight but get to sleep. What I think would be a cool goal? Haven't chatted with my hubby yet but an idea ^_^ , I would love to do the 3 day walk with Lisa and whoever would join us next year. I was very proud of her and her blisters this year and think that if I keep that goal in mind, I can do more and more miles a day in my one hour and work up to more hours =] I might get my waist back yet! I haven't set any goals to start running after my walking improves, I'm still not sure my reactive asthma would let me, or my old knee's and hips - lol I won't go on.

So ladies, besides having baby blues or depression may I suggest the following: 1. Excercise - OUTSIDE while you can, its nice to be OUT of the house. 2. Find a friend willing to be positive when you are having your negative and vice versa (male or female) 3. If it is clinical - get medicine, it won't go away on it's own, you'll just think it did until it slams you. 4. Check to see if it really isn't your hormones! After all, having kids really screws up our bodies - mentally and physically.