There's nothing like a good show that reminds you of things that this crazy, past paced world makes us forget. I think I need to post the saying above a door frame or every door frame of my house. However, for me it should read: "I believe, I believe, I'm just being silly, so I believe". Believe in myself that is. It's been an interesting week and it's only 1pm on Tuesday! Kinda hate weeks like this...lol. Anyhow, my week started on Sunday, like everyone's does =P: however, it was snowing and the there was ice under the snow on the roads. I have lived in Utah all my life, I freaking know how to get around in the snow! Unless of course I'm driving a Tahoe that doesn't have a working 4 wheel drive. >.> No, no accidents - I do still know how to drive, dumb rear-wheel drive or not. We fishtailed out onto the main road - I laughed, Olivia was like 0_0 - psh. Dropped Anthony off, Ben was already there and I was running a bit late and Anthony had to be seated at the Sacrament table before the meeting started. Thank you, thank you, I did a PERFECT parellel park in front of the building, ice or no - straight in, no adjustments needed. First time in the Tahoe too, but I've also been driving a mid-size or mini-van for the past 16 yrs so size was not a problem - I ha
ve to admit though, my mirrors that rotate when I back up are GREAT! he he. I was close enough Olivia could step right out onto the sidewalk, so I waited til she was out and as I got out, looking back to ask if she was alright - WHAM! Foot right out from under me and my butt and arm met the ice. She heard my little squeal and I laughed saying "good, cuz I'm not!". Thankfully only one vehicle was heading towards us and not the normal barrage that is normally on the road with a Catholic church across the street. My pride was slightly damaged (gotta love pride right?), my arm scraped up, and my beautiful new velvet black jacket with now obvious white scrapes up the sleeve....I think I'm more ticked about that than anything - the arm is simply an annoyance at this point considering the bruise from elbow to wrist and the itchy healing scrapes. =P ...Even though this was eventful, it was not what I meant by what a great week! lol.I actually stayed for all 3 hrs of church, even with a screaming arm. I tried to help with a screaming 10 mo old during Sunday School - she wanted Dean but than really wanted Dad not us.....than sat next to one of my friends during Relief Society to help her with her 10 mo old. The lesson was one of the General Conference talks by President Uchtdorf. It was a lesson I needed to hear...sigh. I knew I needed to hear it so I resisted my impulse to get up and leave towards the end of the lesson when nature called. (I knew I would not return) Tell me this doesn't sound like me "If life and its rushed pace and many stresses have made it difficult for you to feel like rejoicing, then perhaps now is a good time to refocus on what matters most". *sigh.. I read the quote: "When stress levels rise, when distress appears, when tragedy strikes, too often we attempt to keep up the same frantic pace, or even accelerate, thinking somehow that the more rushed our pace, the better off we will be". Yeah, let's sum up the past 4 yrs of my life in one quote - thanks Sister Blount for handing me that particular one. Only problem is, as explained in the lesson and known as fact to me, the more frantic and the longer your frantic, the harder you fall and the worse things fall apart - which they will, for that pace cannot be maintained. Mine is the metabolism I guess that I store things up. I want to share but find it difficult; therefore, I push it down and build a wall around it. Than the foundation of the wall begins to crumble out from underneath me and I am left pounding my fists against hardened stone while having barefeet being pierced by broken pieces that have begun to fall. Thought - I just read a book that mention old time Labryinth's - I think I shall do a little research to make a full picture of this. It mentioned that the Labryinths were used in England by the church's ....if you did not focus on where you were going and doing - you would end up lost and alone (sounds familiar) but if you focused you would end up at the center..you would be at peace, having centered your thoughts and reflecting - you would also be able to than turn around and find your way out- so in a sense, re-enter the world. Everything I have pushed down and built walls around have created my own Labryinth if you will. The goal of my life right now must be not to tear the walls down, but find the opening between them - allowing myself to travel forward and not forever spin in circles.
