=] I was reflecting on a conversation I had last night and for no reason felt depressed when the conversation was over, so I wanted to understand why. I really hope the friend I was chatting with didn't pick up on it. I realized today that it wasn't the conversation so much as it was the feeling of inadequecy that I had during and after. I was comparing myself, my lifestyle, and my "world" if you will to this friends. It wasn't that mine was coming up lacking but I noticed how totally different they are, and was thinking to myself, "Why would this person pick me, to be friends with?" Yes, I know that could be taken as a self-esteem issue but I really think that many of us have that thought run through our minds time from time. Well, tonight, chatting with another friend, it came to me. I'm not really doubting myself but doubting my friend and that's not fair. I'm doubting that they are smart enough to choose their own friends, to understand their feelings or relate to two souls meeting again after seperation. By judging myself unworthy, I've actually judged them. Than watching Ghost Whisperer tonight they were talking about what I was thinking =] They made the comment "that we never know the affect we have on people- even the simplest things we do, may be a turning point for others". So I leave this thought process with you with my synopsis : "True friendship is taking a complete stranger; with all their differences, accepting them and loving them wholeheartedly anyways." Thanks T.
2 comments:
Hey there dear Kathee. :) Yeah, I do think these kinds of thoughts and others do come to us, daily, hourly, often.... This morning I had some thoughts where I was comparing myself and getting down, but I've been noticing them a lot lately, so this morning when they came, I made the conscious decision, "No, you're not going to put me down today." :) Everyday little successes. :)
I love your quote at the end!! Love you Kathee.
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