Making a joke at the title without even realizing - hmm guess I am somewhat awake. =]
Why is that a joke? Well cuz I started excercising again- yay me - only crunches and push ups and what happens? I start to spot >.< ok hello? That's just stupid. So - do I keep excercising and lose weight like I'm really, really wanting to do and put up with endless spotting and cramps? or do I just say to heck with it I'm fat and continue hating myself =]. Hmm what a dilema =P.
You will please note by this posting that it is still in the am time frame; however, it is NOT 3am like normal. YAY - well for today anyway. =]
Not really sure what I'm posting today, just felt like I should, so I guess it will show up =]. With this excercise thing, its almost feeling like I'm not taking my pills >.< not a good thing. So its put me in the mood of, who am I? I really, REALLY hate being waffley. Before I die I would really like to know how to have a heathly self-esteem. Not overly confident and not pitiful - just healthy. Accepting who I am and not caring what others think. Right now I keep going up and down. One day my brain tells me all is good, I have friends, this outfit doesn't make me look tooooo fat and than the next day its as if the world has crashed in on me. Why would I think that person liked me - me of all people - what makes me so special? No, no matter what I do, I am fat - no outfits gonna hide that. ARGH! Very frustrating, very irritating - and knowing me I'm honestly not looking at it as an attitude but more as - reality. Meh, enough about that.
2 comments:
Sweety, you are who you are. I will always be your friend weather your fat, thin, tall or short. It's not about looks that makes a person, it's whats in their heart. Huggles Sweety. ^_^
Gosh, I just realized that I never got back to you about us getting together. I'm so sorry! Needless to say, that weekend we talked about didn't work out. Heather was talking about maybe meeting in Salt Lake for lunch or something. The only problem is that I am now in classes all day Saturdays. So, we'll have to figure something out. Let me know what you think! Again, I'm sorry! Too much school on the brain!
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